“We are very much supportive of the family - the biblical
definition of the family unit," Cathy said. "We are a family-owned
business, a family-led business, and we are married to our first wives. We give
God thanks for that." This is what
stirred all the controversy. It led Chicago mayor Rahm Immanuel to say that
Chick-fil-A does not represent Chicago values. It is fascinating to hear
politicians say such foolish things without realizing they do not speak for all
their representatives. There are thousands of Christians in Chicago, all of whom
disagree with the mayor’s statement.
Can Dan Cathy be for the biblical
definition of marriage without being against gay marriage? Logically speaking,
he cannot. This means that, at a minimum, the gay and liberal outrage over
Cathy’s statement indicates they understand what the biblical definition of
marriage is, and that is a good thing. Now, here is the 64 thousand dollar
question: Can a Christian be against gay marriage, and oppose gay sex and not
hate gay people? What the gay community refuses to do is prove the truthfulness
of their argument. It is as if our culture has completely forgotten how to
examine a proposition. Let’s frame it up in the form of a debate.
1) To oppose or disapprove of a
behavior is hateful; 2) I oppose or disapprove of gay sex; 3) Therefore, I hate
gay people. What is wrong with this argument? The argument may be logically
valid but that does not mean it is true. To be valid, all that is required is
that the conclusion follow from the major and minor premises. However, in order
to be true, the conclusion must flow from true premises. Premise 2 is true. Is
premise 1 true? If we really want to examine the claims of an argument or
proposition, we must examine the assumptions that underlie the basic premises
of the argument itself. It is foolish and naïve to skip this step. Can we hate
a certain behavior without hating the person who committed it? Let’s say your
child got a DUI. Let’s say your dad was an abusive alcoholic. Let’s say you
hate drinking in any form. You despise it. Let’s say you hate the idea that
your son consumes alcohol. Let’s say your son got in trouble for driving while
intoxicated. Is it true that you hate your son because he drank (a behavior you
hate), and drove while impaired (another behavior you hate)? I would suggest
that no reasonable person would accuse you of hating your son on the basis that
you hate his behavior of drinking or even of driving while impaired. This begs
the question, why do we let the gay community or the liberal community as far
as that goes, get away with such a flimsy argument without calling them out.
What the gay community cannot establish is this idea that to disapprove of gay
marriage or the gay lifestyle is ipso
facto hateful and bigotry. I am not a bigot when I refuse to hire someone
to drive a company vehicle after discovering they have a DUI on their record. I
am a prudent business man when I do that. In other words, intolerance in and of
itself does not make someone a bigot. If that were the case, then we are all
bigots on some front and to some degree. Welcome to the club.
Let’s say my daughter is gay. She
engages in sexual relations with another woman. Knowing that I am a Christian,
she knows I do not approve of her behavior. However, she also knows that I love
her and would do anything in the world for her except compromise my commitment
to divine truth, the values of the Christian group. If I did that, I would
betray God and the Christian group and demonstrate that my loyalty lies somewhere
else. It is either/or. This is why Jesus said you cannot love God and mammon at
the same time (even if Americans say that you can). You embrace either the
values of the Christian group or values that are outside the Christian group. Whether
you are in the Christian group or not will depend on which set of values you
embrace without waxing too theological here. (I am not espousing Christian
moralism for those who might fear that I am). Of course I am not attempting to
wax theological on soteriology here.
The gay contention that opposition
of gay behavior is bigotry or hateful does not hold water. Even though men and
women have sexual attraction to one another, it is forbidden that we engage in
sex outside of marriage regardless of those natural desires. Sexual urges are
within the control of the individual. Married people are sometimes tempted to
engage in sex with someone other than their spouse. They are expected to
restrain that urge because such behavior is wrong. That urge is natural. However,
we are fully expected to manage it appropriately. The same is true with gay
sex. It is no different. We are expected to manage our sexual appetites, not
give them free reign. That being said,
homosexuals are not an ethnic group or a religious group, or any such thing.
Therefore, it is impossible to categorize opponents of homosexuality as bigots
without at the same time categorizing everyone who insists we accept
homosexuality as bigots also. The etymology of the word bigot is wrought with problems. There seems to be an association
with religious hypocrite bound up in the word. It is a word that has its origin
in the French language. The modern definition means a narrow-minded person
intolerant of beliefs other than his own. Well, this definition begs a
definition of intolerant. Intolerance
is the unwillingness to endure a differing opinion. There is no question but
that the Christian group must be tolerant of outside views. The Christian group
must recognize that outsiders are outsiders precisely because their opinions
and lifestyles do not reflect those of the Christian group. Otherwise, they
would be in the Christian group. What the Christian group will not, and cannot
tolerate, indeed, must not tolerate, is Christians who wish to hold opinions
contrary to the values of the Christian group while remaining in the group.
Such tolerance betrays loyalty to God in preference for what is popular in the
culture or with some other group.
In the end, it really is quite
simple. Christians oppose gay sex and gay marriage because, well, they are
Christians. As such, they have a duty to hold to a very specific set of values.
They cannot abandon these views and remain Christian. Defection from Christian
values is defection from Christianity. Americans do not think this way, but
then again, Americans are not always right in how they think. The gay response
to Christian opposition should be, “well, they are Christians and we would
expect them to oppose gay behavior. That is what a Christian would naturally
do. We disagree with them.” Moreover, Christians should not expect homosexuals
to adopt Christian values. It is not the duty of Christianity to force its
values and morals on others through political activism. It is the duty of
Christians to publish the gospel and make disciples of all nations. That is the
mission of the Christian group. It is not the outward transformation of society
that leaves the internal unchanged.
This being the case, Christians
are not bigots. We do tolerate differing opinions and we must. However,
tolerating those opinions is not the same thing as agreement. Disagreement is
necessary in order for tolerance to exist. What Christians cannot tolerate is
anyone in their group abandoning the group’s values while attempting to remain
visibly in the group. It is true that many in the gay community want to force
the Christian group and Christian organizations to accept the gay lifestyle as
God-approved. They want admission into the Christian group and acknowledgement
by the group that they can abandon Christian values and still be defined as
Christian. The Christian group would cease to exist if that were to happen. As
I said in the beginning, the values of Christianity are permanently and
eternally established due to the fact that they are derivative of the divine
nature of God Himself.
I say to the gay person that I
love you the same as any other person outside the Christian group. I will not
treat you any differently than I do any other person outside the group. However,
I will not, indeed, I cannot abandon the values of Christianity in order to
approve of your lifestyle. I do not have the authority to do such a thing even
if I wanted. I will serve you like I would any other person. You do not have to
adopt my values in order for me to treat you with dignity and respect. However,
if you insist that I have to accept your behavior as morally acceptable in
order to be respectful toward you, I must disagree. The Christian group, and
hence God Himself, defines for me what respect really is. Those values I cannot
and will not relinquish. If we can be friends with this understanding in mind,
I am perfectly fine with that. If you decide that friendship is impossible under such an arrangement,
that is a decision that you and you alone must make.
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